Photo’s Never Lie

Before Photoshop, a photograph remained just that. Something you liked, stuck in a frame and put on the mantelpiece or something you hated but mum and dad loved and stuck in a frame and put on the mantelpiece. Either way, as far as I can remember I have always hated having my picture taken.
A little while ago, one of the first friends I made here in Malaysia emailed me a photo he had found way back from his wedding registration. Still not sure why he felt the need to remind me of how much of a heifer I had become during my studies, on opening the file I was shocked. Nope, mortified, was that really me?
It seems whilst living out in the sticks in the little Welsh village of Llandeilo studying the birds and the bees (I am talking about wildlife illustration), food had become a great comfort, my new best friend. There was not a lot of opportunity to work out. I was not running back then (although there were a couple of attempts) and the nearest gym was 15miles away. There was bad weather and plenty of pubs – so you do the math! From being a fit 19year old I rapidly transformed at a galactic pace into an unfit lardy arse. The mad thing is I didn’t realise this transformation was taking place. I still fit (albeit squeezed) into the same clothes and my friends said nothing – that’s the British politeness for you. As for my family, they said, “Emma, don’t you look well” (I think they forgot to add on, rounded).
When I arrived in Malaysia for a 6week work placement, you could say people who had seen me the year before were rather shocked. But it wasn’t until I turned up for Squash one evening when it really hit home. I used to play at the Valley Club in Subang. Mostly with guys there was one local lady who sometimes turned up. Well. She took one look at my new ‘healthy’ shape and said, “Emma! Wahhhhh, so fat one Ah? Must have put on at least one stone, Ah????” Don’t you just love the “tell it how it is” attitude over here?
Anyway, it did the trick. I went to the gym and got on the scales to check the damage. Back then I usually weighed around 57kgs (heavy enough) I had ballooned to 64 in a just 3months. I made a vow there and then never to go down that path again.
I won’t throw that picture away because it was of a happy day. I may not like what I saw, and I may not like looking at it, but at the end of the day it’s just FAT. You can get rid of that by upping the training and reducing the food, (with some stern discipline thrown in for good measure of course). We all strive for the perfect body; I believe more so in this sport than any other. Lyrca is not forgiving; it stretches yes, but over ALL those love handles. Will we ever be happy with our appearance? No matter how hard we train, how much we diet and how many thousands of sit-ups we do, I think you all know the answer is NO. But the importance is having a happy place on the inside. Find that, keep it, cherish it and above all else LOVE YOURSELF.
Note: I am still a work in progress and still hate having my picture taken but believe I have made a giant step forward today by posting this ghastly snap. At the end of the day, that’s all it is – a picture.