Running On Empty

A few days ago I posted on facebook that I would like to at least once get down to 'my' race weight. I have done 8 triathlons this year and never hit that magic number - I have 3 left for 2009. Would it really make such a difference? I think a marginal difference in my run, yes. The biggest difference would be my confidence. If you feel good about yourself, feel lean and healthy, that in itself is a huge boost that helps fuel the confidence for your race.

Triathletes are an obsessive bunch. All athletes have hang ups and body conscious issues. It seems we are never happy with what 'We' see. Others don't see what we see and it can become a fine line between being an unhealthy obsession and just an obsession to get your body into the best possible shape for a race.

I have always poked fun about the fuel belt around my middle...lets call it my 'O'. I say that I need that extra bit of padding to do what I do and do it well. But the bottom line is I would do almost anything to not have that padding there and as such am trying to eradicate or at least reduce the size of the 'O'.

In my short time in this sport I have never experienced the 'bonk'; when your body is flat out depleted and starved of fuel. You start to lose all common sense and when you should be putting the fuel in you don't. Following a strong training day yesterday I refueled and ensured I ate pasta last night. It is a carb a do not eat much of but I do swear by it's fueling properties prior to running long.

So dinner last night was vege pasta, hot milo with susu :) a huge Chinese pear and a little later on a protein bar. Woke up and was not hungry but for some reason I made a piece of toast and butter and chomped it down with the coffee - maybe I had an inkling of what was to come?

Legs were pretty sore this morning, yesterday's push on the run obviously took its toll and my shoulders were killing me. That's another story though, but yes I have a lot of discomfort in my shoulders when I run?? :(

I set off from the petrol station before the rest of the group and turned up to double hill which I had previously dialed in for my route. I knew it was going to get nasty and sometimes it is best to go alone. On the final few 100metres of double hill I saw TSB and jogged down with him I felt okay at this stage, but was that the drop of pace?

Just 12minutes left to run and my-O-my how quickly things can get nasty. I started on my final loop that I have discovered and got half way up a short but steep hill and almost fell over. My stomach was crying out for food. I knew it was too late. I left some gel shots in the car. STUPID STUPID STUPID. But usually I am okay and don't need any other nutrition than iscotonics. But then again that's when I am not being so careful of the food intake!

I had to turn around and jog it home. A combination of a giddy jog, I was berating myself and having a right old chat. Then I started panicking and then the asthma come along...this has not happened for a long time. Usually it will stop me dead, but this morning I was not going to stop and damn it I was not going to walk either. Another good talking to, this time - 'calm down' breathe, relax, BREATHE!!! It worked I got back but was absolutely on empty.

So I guess what I am saying in my usual long-arsed waffle way is in the pursuit of our idea of perfection we can and do subject our body to dangerous levels. What we do day to day is no small thing. You have to remind yourself of that fact. Because some days you are thinking whats the big deal about the training I do? Whats the big deal about feeling wiped out most of the time? It is a long time since my life was anything other than this routine and I have to admit perhaps I treat it a bit too lightly especially following such a strong day. Note to self: Must remember I am not super women - YET :)

FUEL is important. I love to cook and I love to eat. But I to am in pursuit of my idea of perfection and anyone who isn't is most probably lying. But I did learn a lesson here. It is not to NOT cut back on my intake, that wasn't the problem. I should have made sure though that I had nutrition with me to put in BEFORE those hunger ghosts came-a-haunting. I am never without food on the bike, I am well known for always having a stash of fuel. Why I didn't take it this morning...perhaps becasue I had no pockets and would have had to hold the damn shots. LAZY, STUPID.

I made up for it though and am now fueled back up...when you train as much as we do you have to enjoy eating even when it's cut down. So what am I doing this afternoon? Gonna get me some ice cream - it's Sunday!